withdraws

Hella withdrawing from smoking and twitter! Lol I think its more of me wanting a cig...
Ugh all for a better me right? smh

40 days & 40 nights of lent. This is going to be the hardest lent ever! Lol

xoxo
-tay

2am

2 am in california on the weekend is an eventful time.

At 2am they stop serving liquor and you can't buy anymore.
At 2am the clubs let out. You can catch all the fights of the jealous bitchs who were hating on each other.
At 2am that guy you gave your number is blowing up your phone to see if you wanna "kick it"
At 2am the girl you keep callin is ignoring your call cuz you are breaking the "2 day rule"
At 2am you can catch the sideshows in oakland :)

At 2am I am laying in bed. Typing a blog. Wanting to speak my mind and spill my guts. Trying to think of a way to fill this hole that I have. I've been out the past 2 nights looking for a way to fill this hole. Dancing is shockingly not helpin.

At 2:06 am I just realized that the only way I am going to feel this imaginary hole/void, empty feelings is more time.

theres a song...

I know I said I would do more video posts for some reason they aren't going as planned. Well I know the reasons. For one I suck at em. My video editor doesn't ready my phone video formats so I can't edit them and make em coo. And then a lot of you just don't watch em. So I guess its back to writing.

Its sucks trying to find your way in this blogging world!
Its a cold world. Lol

But yeah just wanted to chop it up.
Leave some comments y'all. I wanna hear your thoughts its been a min. Lol

xoxo
-tay

jibber jabber, tila tequilla, cow007

Hahaha so I hella don't know what happened with this post:

the last 18 hours

The last 18 hours has been HELL!
Why do the people you care for the most always seem to let you down and hurt you the worst?
Maybe its because the people we care for the most are always our closest confadonts [sp], lovers, friends, spouses, family etc. And maybe we get out hopes up so high for the possibility that since they care for us also they won't hurt us or do us wrong?
The only people that have never done me dirty is my mom and my son. Also a very select few friends. But I wouldn't put anything past anyone right now.
I've been let down and hurt by one person that has been the closest to me the past 9 months. I don't think I could every trust or confide or love or care or anything for someone again. The people that are in my life now I love and would do anything for BUT I am even at the point to where I don't even know if I wanna put any effort into anyone besides me son of course.
I always say "do you" I need to take my own advice because it doesn't seem like anything else is working for me relationship wise.
18 hours ago, I was happy, in love, enjoying life. Now I'm trying to get back to that state of mind while moving past the last 18 hours

happy NYE

Omg, I hella slacked and stop writing on this blog.
I've been. Threw so much since I stopped writing.
But ima write everyday from now on... PROMISE
Wheater its a couple sentences or bullshit I'm writing

Anyways
HAPPY NEW YEAR!

me, chi, & bakugans

ummm yea

So this is just another boring blog post. I litteraly woke up a hour and a half ago. Ima start writing my blogs at night so I don't have this problem anymore I can just publish them in my sleep. Lol
Don't wanna let y'all down.

But I'm soooo tired. Was up till 4:30 am trying to work things out with that special someone. Just trying to be cool and come to terms with our WHOLE relationship. The stuff I write about I also go threw. I also practice what I preach. So if I say something on here. I MOST LIKLY goin threw it myself or have went threw it.
I'm hardheaded and stubborn I have to learn the hard way no matter how many heartbreaks I go threw. I'm dumb. Lmao but hey.... its life right?

xoxo
-tay

ughh

blank and spechless...
never happens... theres a first for everything.

xoxo
-tay

we the west

yaaaay!
ima writer for wethewest.com now. doing the sacramento divison!
i feel like i signed a deal im that excited :)
Already working on the first story

xoxo
-tay

up in the air

I love writing this blog. I get up every morning and write. Sometimes if the subject is big ill write it over night.
But I'm having some thoughts about it... I don't know what direction to go with this blog. I try to write about everything relationships, love, sex, beauty whatever comes to mind. So far its worked. BUT its likei get the most clicks when its a post on sex.
I want to write about the things that interest people while still keeping my outline on how I would like my blog.
I don't want to write about the samethings over and over...
Guess ima do some re-thinking and get it together

meme

Hahaha this is my "meme" hahaha
It sounds dirty to me... maybe my mind is in the gutter...
But "meme" reminds me of "gigi" if you don't know what a "gigi" is... google please. Lol
I have nothing to talk about... lol watchin emril!
I love the cooking shows...
But yeah... ima stop writing this "meme" [lmao] relax for today and get started on my weekly "let's talk about sex" blog for tomorrow *wink wink*

Ewwww emril says "awww yeah babe" when he cooks sounds like he's humpin lol


xoxo
Tay